Conceit

Trying to Justify Procrastination:

So, I got myself into a little trouble last week by using my special power of procrastination (and +3 laptop of distraction) and ended up skipping out on some work till the last minute. Now, I need to make a clarification here. Unlike other people who suck at procrastinating, I’m awesome at it. A lot of people blather on about how they are excellent under pressure, but I am a true champion. For instance, I was unhappy taking a normal amount of school. I wanted more deadlines, less free time, and more research. I got it. The difference is, if I do say so myself, that I do these things well. I was derelict in my work on a correspondence course my last semester in school, so I begged the professor to do a semester’s worth of reading and lengthy papers for the senior level class in less than one month. This is while I was taking other classes. I did it all; I made a very high A in the class.

The funny thing is, I’m not sure I would have done so well if I would have started doing the lessons over the winter break as planned. There is something about spending late night furiously typing and mumbling things to myself that I love. I figure it comes down mostly to my very low self-esteem. If I finish something extra early (as I was want to do in middle school and my first year of college) I tended to agonize over it, edit it, and end up destroying it with too many explanations. When I draft something only a little while before a deadline, it seems more contextual. I can edit it as one of the audience, because I feel as though I am in their state of mind—more concerned about whether it works rather than if it makes the author look good.

Obviously, this is not serving me well in my current career. It behooves me to get it done and move on because the more I do so, the more I can pick up. This leads to more money, which is the end. (Right?) I’m the means. The problem for me is that I hate not having work and love being rushed. The result? Dragging it out to its ultimate conclusion, then powering out the same stuff I would have done a week ago. I knew I needed to fix this. It hasn’t effected me, yet, and I know its something people hate. Clients always like things early.

Sooooo. I started fixing artificial deadlines for myself a few days before things are due. For instance, I have some stuff to do tomorrow (my timeline) that isn’t actually due until next week. I’m not a very stern taskmaster (though far from undisciplined), so I’m not sure how long this will last. The point is that I’m trying!

I find it necessary to interject here that despite my atrocious habits, I have never EVAR been late on a deadline. I cannot even think of a time since I was in high school yearbook that I have even been close. Also, despite what this blog indicates, I am also a stickler for editing. So there.

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